Friday, October 12, 2007

Random Emotions

Today is the last weekday I get to spend with my little guy. I return to work on Monday (only four weeks off). I was offered a promotion at work with a 20% raise that I couldn't pass up. In order to take this job, I needed to return early. I'm very happy about the promotion and that I'll be making more money, but I'm really sad that I'm leaving my little guy. Fortunately, my mother is watching him so I don't have to worry about him. Still, this isn't easy for me. If it were up to me, I would be a stay at home mom. I love spending time with him.

Speaking about cutting my maternity leave short, I have not rested at all. Now, I knew things would be hectic with a newborn, but the move added to the stress. Of course, I don't get anything done with the baby around while Dan is at work. But you know how I'm suppose to sleep when he sleeps? Yeah, that hasn't happened much. I believe I've napped a total of three times in these past four weeks. The truth of the matter is that once I'm up, I'm up. It doesn't help either that I have a million things to do when he's napping.

My mornings are good. I make it a point to go online while I pump, drink my coffee, and have breakfast. If I don't put this time aside, then I won't have any "me" time. Tending to a baby all day without having some free time is brutal. Also, I have to make it a point to eat because I get caught up with everything that's going on and forget.

Yesterday marked a month since William was born. Even though I'm extremely happy that he's growing and is very healthy, I'm also sad that he's changing. He's already wearing a size one in diapers and has begun drinking 4 ounces of milk instead of three. His face is changing, too. It's fuller and rounder. He's also more alert following you around with his gorgeous eyes. Again, I'm very happy about all of these changes, but a part of me wants him to stay very small.

Alright, I must go. I just finished my breakfast and now I don't have an excuse to be online. He's actually calm laying on his rocker. So, let me take advantage of this and try to unpack a box or two. Chat with you soon!

1 comment:

gretchen said...

Oh, I'm sorry that you have to go back to work already! Just 4 weeks is not long enough! Especially considering that you moved during that time. I don't think I could even get my shirt buttoned right when my babies were 4 weeks old :-)

But the pay raise is a good thing, and it's great that your mom can watch him- that will make the transition a lot easier. Enjoy today!!