Sunday, January 08, 2006

Weight

My second to last semester in college (I was taking 21 credits), I decided to ease up my load and take a few fitness classes. I believe I took a total of three exercise classes, but it was three years ago and my memory is failing me at this moment. I was exercising every single day and loved it. OMG do I love exercising. Yeah, there are days that I don't want to get out of bed. And when I first start an exercise program, it takes me a good two to three weeks to get used to the new routine, but then it becomes part of the norm.

I took these classes at the height of my fatness. Yes, I was fat. When you weigh 202 pounds and are only 5.5, you are fat. I was busting out of my size 16 jeans. I resorted to wearing sweatshirts most of the time because they wouldn't press against my stomach. Tying my sneakers was a hassle. I would loose my breath. Actually, I would have to hold my breath in order to tie my sneakers. If I didn't, I would get winded. Another major thing--I couldn't cross my legs. I could put my leg up over my other leg, but I wouldn't be able to cross them like thin women do. Strangely enough, I was only able to lift my left leg over the right one. I guess my left leg is more flexible (come to think about it, it always has been). If I tried crossing my legs normally, it would also make me loose my breath and hurt my bulging stomach.

I hated being fat. I wasn't attractive. Yeah, my insides are great, but the first thing you see is the outside. Not that I was trying to pick anyone up, but I was quite embarrassed being naked in front of Dan. I would sleep on my side, and my stomach would just hang over. There was no way in hell I could sleep on my stomach. It actually hurt. Let's not talk about the double chin I had. Oh and my favorite--back fat!!!! You know what I'm talking about. The fat that hangs right below your bra strap (I still have a tiny bit of it left). I remember Dan bought me an orange ribbed sweater that was very adorable. I preceded to wear it one day that we had gone out shopping. I caught a glance of myself on a three-way mirror and saw the back fat. I was mortified. I became so upset that I left the store and yelled at Dan for not telling me that I had back fat. Since the color of the sweater was orange, you could imagine how pronounced my back fat looked.

I could go on about how horrible I looked and felt. I'm not quite sure how I let myself get this way. Or why I let it go on as long as I did. Especially since throughout my fat years, I exercised. What I can say that once I had enough, I had enough. Loosing weight is actually quite simple. I hate to break it to you, but it is. Ready for my remedy? STOP EATING SO MUCH AND MOVE YOUR FAT ASS! I like eating as much as the next person. In fact, I eat all day, but I control my portions. I have to admit that when I'm getting my period I do have a harder time controlling my appetite. Try it for a month. Eat half of what you normally eat and I guarantee that you'll drop some weight (unless you have some type of medical condition, it will work). Or if half is too much for you, then leave a quarter of your meal on the plate. You just have to want to do it. That's the secret. You have to really want it.

Fifty pounds later, I feel great. I worked out and watched what I ate. Even though I have stopped dieting, I still watch what I eat. I try not to overdo it. Loosing another 15 lbs. is my next goal. I want to become very fit. I want to look at myself naked and feel good about my body. I also want to take fitness upto the next level by becoming a spinning instructor. This will take some time because I haven't been on a spinning bike since that class I took in college. There are only six months left for summer to come around and I'm wearing a two piece to the beach.

1 comment:

all that's right, or not said...

Hey! I was just looking at your knitting blog and saw a picture of you, YOU LOOK GREAT! I just got back into working out. I forgot how much I loved how it makes me feel and how it makes me look (eventually), and how enjoyable it actually is to do. I would also like to be in a nice bathing suit by the summer. Can't wait to see you in July! Talk to you soon
-Winona